Posts

1,214 Days
1,215 Days

Is it Trickin'? Lessons from our Elders

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You ever listen to two old men bragging about being sugar daddies?  Like that is some shit to be PROUD of?
I am getting gas on my way to my sister’s a couple Sundays ago.  The station I went to was one of those Asian-owned joints with the illegal video poker machines in the corner.  Stationed at two of the five machines were two old (65-70ish) men, each nursing a Miller Lite (before noon on a Sunday!) and chatting each other up the way boys tend to do when they’re drinking and playing.
     I was grabbing a drink for myself in addition to gas, so I had to go right by the duo and their conversation was HILARIOUS to me.  My nosy ass slow-walked to the case and fiddled with my phone for a reason to listen to them trying to impress one another for women that weren't around anyway.
#1: “Sheeeeeit, n**ga.  I got me a coupla dem young tenders right now.  Them young girls love me man!” #2: “I hear you” #1: “Just like I told my grandson a couple days ago, it don’t matter if I got gam…
1,216 Days

True Story©... Lyrical Misappropriation

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(photo credit)
     Sometimes when I am all alone, I make up new lyrics to existing songs and repeat them until I remember them.  When the REAL song is on, I will sing my lyrics (loudly) and watch for people’s reaction. Misappropriation is not the same thing as misquoting, which is a different (but actually innocent) fun.
     I cannot imagine either of you reading the above three sentences without wanting examples, so there is really no reason for me to continue pussyfooting with any lead-in here.

One time I’m in my car with my nephews.  I have a radio that is effectively a 6” android computer of sorts, so I have a SanDisk Cruzer in it with all my preferred music on it.  As I picked them up, I was listening to UGK.
Album: Too Hard To Swallow, track 3…  Pocket Full of Stones.
I let Bun B’s verse ride right through without issue, but when verse two started…
“Back in the days they used to run up saying Pimp C what ya know?
I tell 'em get your scones and get the fuck away from me hoe!
Ca…
1,217 Days

Hotep Pussy... Revisited

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Y’all remember before I met Mimi and had it stuck in my head to get at a Hotep chick and she wound up slowly ruining my life? Sure you do. Lemme remind you. Caught up now?  Let me continue…
So I am chilling at work a couple of weeks ago.  I gets a text message from a number I had apparently not saved or had since deleted.  If you read the link above before continuing here, then you know I deleted it instead of simply not saving.
Texter: “Peace Yakub Me: “Huh?  Who dis?” Texter: “So you just gon act like you don’t remember me?” Me: “Well, I got a new phone/carrier in October.” Texter: “Oh, okay…  It’s [redacted].” Me: “OHHH!!!  But, um…  Yakub?” Texter: “Oh, I forgot, you was faking shit.  Normal coon-types say ‘hey bighead.’” Me: “Watch that coon shit, I can block you just as easily.  You were the one who had me in crocheted pants and shit.” Texter: “Chill.  I was just checking in on you.  Hadn’t heard from you in a while.  What you been up to?” Me: “You ain’t miss me, you miss what this mout…
1,218 Days

Phood Phun with Phlip... Citrus Pepper Wings and Cauliflower Florentine Bake

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This week will be really simple.  In the blitz of life-changing maneuvers and being busy with work and life in general, sometimes cooking needs to be kept as simple as possible.  I am just going to apologize/not apologize right out front.  We normally plan these on the weekend coming into the week, but one of the most important people in my life got hitched this weekend so we were busy celebrating.
Yet, we must still eat good to live good. Lemon citrus pepper baked chicken wings and cauliflower Florentine bake.
Let’s start with the wings:
Chicken (duh!)1/3 cup lime (or lemon if you prefer) juice2 tbsp olive oilOnion Powder, lemon lepper seasoning and salt all to taste
Plan ahead.  Cut the wings into sections and place into a large bag then mix the above wet and dry ingredients for a marinade and mix well.  Put it aside in the fridge and leave the house for several hours.
     Once back in the kitchen, pre-heat the oven to 375°.  Spread your wings on a lined and sprayed cooking sheet an…
1,219 Days