With the success of last week's QOTD, I decided that I would probably make a point of dropping one of those on Facebook, email and yaddayaddayadda about every time I can think of one. Today's comes in the wake of Tiger Woods' epic bitch move in apologizing in the face of not having actually broken any laws. [Phlip note - more on that in a later post]
The question presented was
"in the wake of all this tiger talk... would you rather your significant other cheat on you or just leave?"
Of course, as with anything, when I am soliciting the opinions of others on these things, I asked people to be as specific as possible when answering. As usual, I emailed the question to some people who might not have access to my Facebook as well to get a full and well-rounded group of answers. Diversity, if you will.
My first respondent this time was the homie Tony Grands via email, with: "I'd rather she leave. I'm selfish, & don't generally play well with others. E…
I bought an Audi.
All I did was buy a fucking Audi!
I didn’t sell any drugs, perhaps I was wrong for having
dealt with a foreign government, and the inconvenience of the logistics of
dealing with them leaves it where I am done with those smelly motherfuckers
first chance I get ANYWAY.
But here I am,
shackled to a chair and cuffed to a table with a couple of federal agents
staring at me with the stinkface…
Me: “Look, just tell me what you need to know.”
Agent: “Wanna tell us where you got this shiny new
Me: “You know EXACTLY what dealership I bought
it from, they sent you the paperwork that helped you find m--…”
Agent: “SHUT THE FUCK UP, YOU KNOW WHAT WE MEAN!”
Agent: “Where did you get the money?!”
Me: “Coal money”
Agent: “Coal money?”
Me: “Coal money”
Agent: “Look, asshole, nothing in your family history
suggests any coal country connections, and the amount of coal it would take to
make even THIS kind of money is more than you would be able …
Angel on my left
shoulder, telling me “Phlip, don’t get on that plane.”
Devil on my right shoulder, telling
me “Phlip, get that money and get the fuck out.”
Internal tug-of-war, provide for my family in a manner that
I had to learn to contribute to as a child, in a manner that I might have never
imagined so easily attainable or stay here in the United States and drive this
bag around and watch these companies shovel out all of the magical coal they
might so need. Pick your poison,
Phillip. Slow burn and hard work or hit
this international lick and be straight one at a time.
Why am I even
second-guessing myself? I KNEW I shouldn’t
be on this fucking plane. As
opportunistic as I have been about trapping this cash over the past six months –
I am at a million and a half now with my under-the-table museum contracts – I am
still quite liberal as far as environmental issues go. At least those in my own back yard, I feel
something when I see my family and friends of my fa…