No longer is it enough to ignore unsolicited contact, I'm at the point in my life where I will exchange banter with these spam types for at least long enough to turn the tables...
I'm minding my business on the couch with the wife when I am rudely interrupted...
Wife: "g'head, play along"
With those words from thine mouth...
... I know how this game starts, finishes and follows through.
A man who swings first stands a better chance of the other party not swinging back.
See? I've already broken the algorithm!
Not today, Russia...
(Phlip note: we weren't putting any damn clothes back on and were already in bed)
I could be making
better use of my time and abilities here…
In the months since I unsuccessfully robbed Santa Claus, I
have exhibited the skills of a man who could sell commodities to market and
internationally, courier goods across state lines, negotiate hostage situations
and most importantly make a TON of fucking money.
It’s August now. I
been at this for 8 months, one client paying enough for all year every three
months and I will see them in a couple of weeks. His buddy has ramped up his ticket sales to
the point where he needs me every three as well instead of the original
six. Between those, I am clearing $575k
every 12 weeks. I am pulling another $25k
every month. Throw in the as-negotiated
HUGE money deal I am taking from that little European country that I cannot
name at this point and I am looking at about $5mil cash on hand, even after
paying off my house and revolving credit.
At this point, my lady still
refuses to retire despite my attempts to get her to go ah…
“this orgy ain’t fun
(if only I’d have known how prophetic those words would become)
The funny thing
about the government getting involved in shit is how quick they are to complain
about the media meddling in shit while pretending not to know that the media is
the VERY official but unstated fourth branch of the government.
But let them be the one driving the narrative and the media
they just hated are their best fucking friends.
I got shook down
and, let’s face it, robbed by two rogue FBI inspectors who quite apparently
entered no paperwork on their interaction with me as they tried to get my
source of income and not do what was right by the American people as far as
national security goes. And I KNOW I was
… at least I know now. When I was at it, all I knew is that I was
trying to make the best of a bad situation of my own design. Domestic and international laws were really
the least of my concerns.
I should probably meet Santa again
on Christmas …