This will be a summary… For the past twelve months, I have chronicled my exploits after
having attempted to rob Santa Claus for the world’s presents.What is left out to those who have not been
watching since Christmas time 2016 is why.
Well here I am to explain it. 1 – Rudolph is a dope fiend
[link] 2 – Santa is Rudolph’s Dealer
[link] 3 – BECAUSE Santa is Rudolph’s dealer, he should be robbed
[link] 4 – Shit is now going south, but I am turning it into money right?
[link] 5 – My greed is getting complicated, but shit is still moving
[link] 6 – Too. Damn. Good. To. Be. True
[link] 7 – I’ve been robbed!
[link] 8 – Fuck robbed, I been kidnapped!
[link] 9 – I want OUT of this situation now…
[link] 10 – … but DAMN this money is good!
[link] 11 – I’m forever to be a victim of my own desires,
[link] 12 – The liberal media only exists sometimes to complicate
[link] 13 – I’m getting out this shit, I have a plan!
[link] 14 – Resolution…Santa wins
I have written THOUSANDS of pages of
shit through …
Angel on my left
shoulder, telling me “Phlip, don’t get on that plane.”
Devil on my right shoulder, telling
me “Phlip, get that money and get the fuck out.”
Internal tug-of-war, provide for my family in a manner that
I had to learn to contribute to as a child, in a manner that I might have never
imagined so easily attainable or stay here in the United States and drive this
bag around and watch these companies shovel out all of the magical coal they
might so need. Pick your poison,
Phillip. Slow burn and hard work or hit
this international lick and be straight one at a time.
Why am I even
second-guessing myself? I KNEW I shouldn’t
be on this fucking plane. As
opportunistic as I have been about trapping this cash over the past six months –
I am at a million and a half now with my under-the-table museum contracts – I am
still quite liberal as far as environmental issues go. At least those in my own back yard, I feel
something when I see my family and friends of my fa…
I could be making
better use of my time and abilities here…
In the months since I unsuccessfully robbed Santa Claus, I
have exhibited the skills of a man who could sell commodities to market and
internationally, courier goods across state lines, negotiate hostage situations
and most importantly make a TON of fucking money.
It’s August now. I
been at this for 8 months, one client paying enough for all year every three
months and I will see them in a couple of weeks. His buddy has ramped up his ticket sales to
the point where he needs me every three as well instead of the original
six. Between those, I am clearing $575k
every 12 weeks. I am pulling another $25k
every month. Throw in the as-negotiated
HUGE money deal I am taking from that little European country that I cannot
name at this point and I am looking at about $5mil cash on hand, even after
paying off my house and revolving credit.
At this point, my lady still
refuses to retire despite my attempts to get her to go ah…