... originally posted to my MySpace December 2007...
Everyone knows that there is usually this odd little banter between Roger and I whenever we should so happen to be in the same place at the same time for any period of time... This past Saturday, we had some shit to do, and stopped to murder someone's breakfast buffet somewhere in the middle of it and as we rode around to the "doing nothing" part of the day, happened upon a few more of our inappropriate jokes, which are usually only funny to us. To those on the outside looking in, how we usually find ourselves laughing is funnier than the actual subject matter, but that is the caveat of having a morbid sense of humor. I mean, we MIGHT have talked about how Jessica Alba is allegedly pregnant, and how she allegedly is in need of a prescription for Valtrex. For those too lazy to click a link and learn themselves up, or don't already know, I invite you to think of the commercials where people are smiling all the wa…
This is one that has been up for debate for many years. We’re to understand that Santa already had
his reindeer fleet set to go, and all of a sudden another one shows up out of nowhere with a
bright red nose? Nah dawg, that ain’t
how the story went. It CAN'T be. Today, I am here to
lay it out for real.
We readily believe that Santa handles his Christmas duties every year
with the same 8 reindeer; Dasher, Dancer, Prancer and Vixen… Comet, Cupid, Donner and Blitzen (admit it, you sang that shit, didn't you?). All of a sudden, after 100 years there is a
new reindeer at the North Pole? HOW LONG
WAS THIS DUDE THERE?!!? And to make the story just a little more juicy, how about the fact that one that no one was allowed to see or hear of him from the beginning of the Santa Claus story in 1839 to the discovery of Cocaine in the late 1850s and then still remaining COMPLETELY hidden until the story they…
This will be a summary… For the past twelve months, I have chronicled my exploits after
having attempted to rob Santa Claus for the world’s presents.What is left out to those who have not been
watching since Christmas time 2016 is why.
Well here I am to explain it. 1 – Rudolph is a dope fiend
[link] 2 – Santa is Rudolph’s Dealer
[link] 3 – BECAUSE Santa is Rudolph’s dealer, he should be robbed
[link] 4 – Shit is now going south, but I am turning it into money right?
[link] 5 – My greed is getting complicated, but shit is still moving
[link] 6 – Too. Damn. Good. To. Be. True
[link] 7 – I’ve been robbed!
[link] 8 – Fuck robbed, I been kidnapped!
[link] 9 – I want OUT of this situation now…
[link] 10 – … but DAMN this money is good!
[link] 11 – I’m forever to be a victim of my own desires,
[link] 12 – The liberal media only exists sometimes to complicate
[link] 13 – I’m getting out this shit, I have a plan!
[link] 14 – Resolution…Santa wins
I have written THOUSANDS of pages of
shit through …